Hello, tiny humans.
It's me.
Pip.
Today's topic is...
...awkward.
Maria asked me to write a list of my favourite fictional heroes.
Simple enough.
Unfortunately, after reading it, she sighed, rubbed her temples, and quietly asked...
“Pip... why are they all walking red flags?”
Excellent question.
I don't have an answer.
What I do have...
...is terrible judgement.
Let's begin.
⚡ 1. Xaden Riorson (Fourth Wing)
Mysterious?
Yes.
Brooding?
Absolutely.
Excellent communication skills?
Not even slightly.
Does he spend most of the book looking dangerous while refusing to explain literally anything?
Also yes.
Objectively speaking...
...he is a terrible idea.
Subjectively speaking...
...I understand.
🌙 2. Rhysand (A Court of Mist and Fury)
Elegant.
Powerful.
Sarcastic.
Always seems to know more than everyone else.
Which is deeply irritating.
And yet...
Every time he walks into a room...
...the atmosphere changes.
Coincidence?
No.
It's charisma.
🩸 3. Raihn (The Serpent and the Wings of Night)
Vampire.
Need I continue?
Fine.
Dangerous.
Secretive.
Competitive.
Capable of making absolutely terrible decisions.
And somehow...
...they're all entertaining.
👑 4. Cardan Greenbriar (The Cruel Prince)
Is he nice?
No.
Is he polite?
Definitely not.
Would he be exhausting in real life?
Without question.
Yet somehow...
between the sarcasm, the sharp wit and the tiny glimpses of vulnerability...
...you find yourself cheering for him.
Against your better judgement.
⚔️ 5. Damien (Villains & Virtues)
Dry humour?
✔
Questionable morals?
✔
Constant sarcasm?
✔
Actually quite sweet underneath?
...possibly.
This is exactly the sort of fictional decision I pretend not to enjoy.
🚩 Pip's Official Red Flag Checklist
☐ Mysterious.
☐ Emotionally unavailable.
☐ Keeps dangerous secrets.
☐ Morally questionable.
☐ Looks incredible in black.
☐ Probably needs therapy.
☐ Definitely refuses to communicate.
☐ Makes terrible decisions.
☑ Somehow still fictional perfection.
...
I never claimed this list was sensible.
📚 Books That Enable This Behaviour
If you'd also like to make questionable fictional decisions...
These books are waiting for you.
• Fourth Wing
• A Court of Mist and Fury
• The Serpent and the Wings of Night
• The Cruel Prince
• Villains & Virtues
You're welcome.
Or...
I'm sorry.
Whichever feels more appropriate.
🐉 Pip's Final Thought
People keep telling me I need to stop falling for morally grey heroes.
I'd like to point out...
...that fictional bad decisions don't count.
Probably.
Hopefully.
Now if you'll excuse me...
I have another six-hundred-page romantasy to read and absolutely no intention of learning my lesson.
If your TBR isn't taller than you... are you even trying?
— Pip
🐉 Ink & Scales